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Answered Questions

In the years since SmartSexResource launched, we have developed a library of questions asked by you, and answered by our expert sexual health nurses.

Our answered questions library cover a broad range of sexual health topics and common questions we hear at our clinics.

STI Prevention (57)

I just had protected vaginal intercourse for 30 seconds about a month ago and I didn’t have much skin to skin contact. It’s been a month and I haven’t had any symptoms. What are my chances of getting genital herpes or syphilis?

Using a condom during sex is a great way to protect yourself from STIs. 

You are right however that with skin to skin contact there is always a risk of getting infections that are transmitted this way. 

Getting genital herpes or syphilis is often more complicated than just having direct skin to skin contact as it involves many different factors like at what stage of the infection the person is at who has the infection (do they even have an infection or are they currently having an outbreak or sores), the immunity of the person who may get the infection (are they already immune, are they healthy, are they immunocompromised), the time, timing and nature of the contact… to name some examples.

If you are sexually active, it’s always a good idea to get tested. If you have symptoms you should get tested right away, and if you do not have symptoms you should get tested routinely at least every 3-4 months or so if you have new or different partners. 

More information about “my chances” can be found here: https://smartsexresource.com/about-stis/my-chances

HealthNurse

My partner let me know that he’s been paying for sensual massage services with a “happy ending”. What is the STI risk?

Hi,

Thanks for your question.

Sensual massage is low-risk for STIs.

Massage with a “happy ending” can mean different things, but often it means that the person receiving the massage also receives sexual stimulation until they ejaculate (cum). The “happy ending” can be done by hand (“hand job”) or mouth (oral sex or “blow job”).

If the “happy ending” is done by hand, then it is very low-risk for STIs. If the “happy ending” was done by mouth (without a condom), then there is a risk for STIs, including: Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, Syphilis, Herpes and HPV. A person can have these STIs without having any symptoms, and the only way to know if they have an STI is to get tested. If the “happy ending” is done by mouth with the condom on, then it is very-low risk for STIs.

If you’re able to speak with your partner more about how he receives the “happy ending” you will have more ideas about potential STI risks.

Hope this helps. Please feel free to comment below or submit another question as needed.

Health Nurse

I just found out my partner has had unprotected sex with other women. I’ve been having troubles with bacterial vaginosis at times. Could this be related? When I found out, I did have STI testing and he did also.

Hi,

Thanks for writing.

That can be difficult to hear that your partner is having unprotected sex with other people. It’s great that you both got tested after.

In terms of the bacterial vaginosis, it’s unlikely to be affected by your partner’s activities. Bacterial vaginosis is not sexually transmitted, or passed between partners. Bacterial vaginosis is an overgrowth of normal vaginal bacteria (so it’s not “bad” bacteria), and it’s your own bacteria (so it didn’t come from anyone else).

It’s common for women get bacterial vaginosis whether they are sexually active or not. Many women will get bacterial vaginosis frequently for a few years, and then it can settle down and not come back. Sometimes women who have multiple sexual partners can get bacterial vaginosis more often, as they are being directly exposed to different people’s bacteria. You would not be exposed to other people’s bacteria through your partner (normal bacteria can’t be passed indirectly, only STIs can be passed indirectly).

Lastly, just a reminder than it can take up to 3 months for STIs to show-up in testing. If you only got tested a few weeks after your partner had other partner’s, it would be good to get re-tested after 3 months just to be sure.

Hope this helps. Please feel free to comment below or submit another question as needed.

Health Nurse

My partner is uncircumcised, can this increase my chance of getting BV? I’ve had recurrent BV and trying to figure out ways to prevent and minimize this annoying infection.

Hi,

Thanks for writing.

Having a partner who is uncircumcised does not increase your risk for bacterial vaginosis (BV).

BV is not sexually transmitted, or passed between partners. Bacterial vaginosis is an overgrowth of normal vaginal bacteria (so it’s not “bad” bacteria), and it’s your own bacteria (so it didn’t come from anyone else).

BV can be very frustrating for many people. The vagina is prone to change, and changes in vaginal pH can lead to BV. It’s common to get BV frequently for a few years, and then not get it again.

BV is treated with antibiotics. There is also some research that shows a natural supplement called Boric Acid can be used to prevent BV. Boric acid is not antibiotics, but it can help to stabilize the vaginal pH, if you find you are having a frequent BV. For more information on Boric Acid please contact a compounding pharmacy near you, or contact Finlandia Pharmacy in Vancouver.

Hope this helps. Please feel free to comment below or submit another question as needed.

Health Nurse

can a man get a sti from oral sex?

Hi,

Yes, sexually transmitted infections (STIs) can be passed through oral sex to people of all genders.

The most common STIs passed with oral sex are gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia, herpes, and HPV. They can be passed to both the giver and reciever.

The chances of getting HIV is considered low. If you had a throat infection, bleeding gums or sores in your mouth it may increase the chances for HIV for the person performing oral sex.

Herpes (cold sores) can be passed from the mouth to the genitals. Herpes Type 2 can be passed from genitals to mouth, although that is uncommon.

For more information on STIs and oral sex, click here.

Using a condom or dental dam for oral sex can reduce the chance of getting STIs from oral sex.

Please leave a comment to let us know if this answers your question or if you need more info.

Health Nurse

Hi Sir,I had received oral sex from a transgender. She had used condom. But I am not sure, whether that condom is teared,That transgender is HIV affected, and She had enough bleeding on her mouth.From the next 2 days onwards, I have body pain and tiredness, even my joints are paining little bit. So I am afraid of this.Could you please advise me if there is any chance of HIV infected and any tests that need to be taken.Thanks a lot if I receive a reply from you.

Hi,

Thanks for your question.

We do not see HIV passed to people receiving oral sex.

Condoms protect against HIV, and it is usually very noticeable when condoms break or tear.

Even if the condom was torn, the chance of getting HIV from that experience is still very, very low. Any blood in the mouth would be diluted by the mouth saliva.

Also, if you were exposed to HIV the symptoms would not show up for 2 weeks. Symptoms starting 2 days after receiving oral sex are not related to HIV, but could be related to Syphilis.

If you are concerned about HIV, we would recommend getting an HIV test, as that is the only way to know your status.

If your symptoms persist, we would recommend going to see a healthcare professional in person.

For more information about the HIV risks of oral sex, check out our Know Your Chances – Oral Sex chart.

Hope this helps,

Health Nurse

I am confused with some things I’ve read on this site and others, A person is contagious even if no warts are present, then after 2 years without a wart it is concitered dormant or a “resolved” infection, what does this mean? Is a person still just as infectious? Will it come back? Or is it more like chicken pox, once your body fights/ beats it it is no longer a threat? I’m talking about the non cancerous types. And if so or not how do we know?

Hi,

Thanks for writing.

Genital warts and HPV can be confusing for a lot of people. The confusion is partly due to the fact that scientists and researchers are still learning about genital warts, and we don’t know everything yet.

One thing we’re learning about genital warts is that some people get ‘transient’ genital warts, while others can get ‘recurrent’ genital warts. When someone has a transient wart that means they will have a visible wart on their skin, but once the wart is gone then the virus is gone. Others who have recurrent warts will have a visible wart on their skin, and once the wart is gone they can still pass on the virus.

We can’t tell who has transient versus recurrent warts. The same types of warts may be transient for some people and recurrent for others. The only way a person can know if they have recurrent warts is by having recurrent outbreaks of warts.

However, most genital warts are transient and HPV is mostly passed when there is a wart present. It’s much less likely for HPV and warts to be passed if there is no visible wart, we just can’t say it’s impossible.

We generally say that after 2 years without any warts that someone has “resolved” their genital wart infection. This means that they likely had a transient infection because they have not had any recurrent warts in a 2 year period. Someone with resolved genital warts is not infectious and will not have future outbreaks (unless they get re-exposed to the virus at another time).

It’s not quite like chicken pox immunity… Transient warts are superficial, and they do not involve the immune system. If you have a transient wart that goes away, then you won’t have any protection against that type of wart (and you can get it again). However, recurrent warts do get the immune system involved, and if you have a recurrent wart then you will be protected against getting that type again. There is a vaccine which protects against genitals warts.

So, yes, it can be difficult to tell who has HPV and who might be infectious. But the most important thing to remember is that genital warts are not cancerous, and not dangerous in any way. The types of HPV associated with cancer are invisible and do not make warts.

Also, we estimate more than 75% of Canadians will have genital warts at some point in their life. That’s most Canadians! Warts are spread through direct skin-to-skin contact, which can happen even when people are using condoms (because there are still parts of the body that can touch). That’s one of the reasons it’s so common.

Lastly, there is no routine testing for HPV, and people are not expected to know their HPV status the same way they know their HIV status. There are also no legal requirements to tell others if you have HPV. Talking to partners about HPV is based a person’s comfort, and their relationship with their partner(s).

Hope this helps. Please feel free to comment below or submit another question if needed.

Health Nurse

If I get cold sore HSV 1 does this mean that my children will carry the HSV 1 virus when they are born?

Hi,

Thanks for your question.

The short answer is: No.

Cold sores are not inherited, but passed through direct skin-to-skin contact.

Having a cold sore does not mean you have genital herpes. Genital herpes can be passed to children if the mother has a genital outbreak during childbirth.

Cold sores can be passed to your child if someone with an active cold sore kisses (or has mouth-to-skin) contact with your child.

Herpes in childhood is very common, and not a serious condition.

For more information about HSV and cold sores check out our Herpes – Patient Guide.

Health Nurse

Hii i m 18..i had an unprotected oral sex with my bf for the first time n the last time just bcoz it was his fantasy or somethng n was not knowing abt its demerits or side effects …so my question is can anything happen to both of us bcoz of this stupid oral sex that we had it 4 days ago ????

Hi,

Oral sex is generally low risk, with few side effects.

We do see some STIs passed with oral sex, including: HPV, herpes, chlamydia, gonorrhea, and syphilis.

Has your boyfriend received oral sex from anyone else before? Has he had penetrative sex with anyone else before?

  • If not, then he can’t have any STIs to pass to you.
  • If yes, then it’s possible for your partner to have an STI that is passed to you through oral sex.

Talk with your boyfriend. If he has had other partners in the past, it might be good to go for an STI test.

Also, listen to your own feelings and thoughts when engaging in sex. If you don’t feel comfortable doing something, you can always say “no” or “not now”.

Hope this help. Please feel free to submit another question if needed.

Health Nurse

My boyfriend who I’ve been dating for 5 months gave me genital HSV 1. I’m now scared to let him preform oral sex on me again because I worry it will cause an outbreak. Is it safe for him to preform oral sex on me if we both don’t or haven’t had any outbreaks in awhile? Will it cause one? Thanks

Hi,

Thanks for writing. HSV can be confusing for lots of people, and it can feel scary too!

If you both have HSV-1, then you cannot pass it to each other.

Once a person has been exposed to HSV-1, their body will create “antibodies” for HSV-1, which will protect that person from getting it again.

So, since you’ve been exposed to HSV-1, he cannot give it to you again. And having more oral sex won’t increase the chance of having another outbreak.

Regarding outbreaks: It’s normal that we see outbreaks after the first time someone is exposed. After that, most people don’t get ongoing outbreaks. If someone does get an outbreak, it has to do with their own immune system and health ( and not becuase they were re-exposed to HSV). When people are healthy their body can keep the virus suppressed (meaning no outbreak), but when someone gets sick they can have outbreaks. 

If both of you have the same stain (HSV-1) you cannot give it to each other again.

You can only give someone HSV-1 if they have never had it. Having oral sex won’t trigger another outbreak.

Hope this helps. Please feel free to submit another question if needed.

Health Nurse