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Alternatives to intercourse

There are lots of sexual things that feel good and do not involve oral, vaginal/frontal hole or anal intercourse (fucking, humping). Movies, TV and porn often show oral, vaginal or anal sex as the main or only ways to have sex. People are led to think that other kinds of sex don’t count as ‘real’ sex.

There may be many reasons why you might want to find other ways of being sexual. You may want to have sex that has a lower chance of STIs. You may want to wait until you know someone better. You might be waiting for your STI test results before you have sex. Or, you may prefer to pleasure yourself by masturbating. 

Whatever your reasons, ways of having sex without intercourse can feel good for you and your partners. Experimenting and playing with different kinds of touch can increase pleasure and teach you a lot about what you and your partner like.

Some ideas that do not involve intercourse:

  • Kissing
  • Hand jobs
  • Self pleasure - masturbation, mutual masturbation
  • Frottage or dry humping - sexual rubbing without intercourse or penetration
  • Online sex
  • Phone sex

You can also experiment with different kinds of sex toys. Make sure to use a new condom on any sex toys that you share with a partner.

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